10 Ways a Psychologist is Different Than a Friend

While nothing beats a true friend, many who are unfamiliar with the mental health profession wonder how seeing a counselor is different from a good chat session with a great buddy.  Here are some ways the two differ:


1. A psychologist has your mental health and well being in mind at all times, without personal biases or secondary motives to get in the way. Even the truest of friends may have difficulty remaining objective at times!

2. A psychologist generally aims to avoid advice-giving. She instead uses her professional knowledge to help you increase your coping and problem-solving skills and to help you carefully evaluate your situation and options so that you can find the answers yourself that are appropriate for your unique circumstances. In this way, you are the ultimate architect of your life, and you leave the therapy relationship with new skills to face new problems in the future.

3. You can disclose to a psychologist what might be too humiliating or embarrassing to discuss with a friend. Chances are, your concerns will not shock or offend a seasoned psychologist.

4. Your “secrets” that you disclose to a psychologist are confidential and generally protected by law. There are some exceptions to confidentiality, such as abuse/neglect, imminent risk of danger to yourself/someone else, and court subpoena (check your state laws).

5. No give-and-take is required. The psychologist is there to help you; no reciprocation is necessary.

6. A psychologist possesses specialized knowledge and skills to help you identify the problem areas in your life, work through your feelings, explore possible solutions, and initiate change. A psychologist is aware of and uses strategies that have been shown by way of scholarly research to work.

7. A psychologist can provide psychometrically sound testing to help determine the source of emotional or behavioral difficulties in your life.

8. You don’t have to worry about burdening or upsetting the psychologist the way you might worry with a friend.

9. Sometimes, friends can vary in the level of support they provide. Your friend might be going through her own problems and not be as available to you. In this way, a psychologist can be more predictable and stable as a source of support.

10. For a variety of reasons, many people feel “safer” discussing their problems with a psychologist who is removed from the situation and is objective.